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COMING ATTRACTIONS | 
contemplating the future | May always starts with that promise of flowers, but this year, it's all about the alter ego.
May 10th and 11th are the dates for the big Alter Ego Show at East Austin's Gallery DV8. It'll be the first show with a new painting from me in nearly a year.
Also, I'm working feverishly on the sequel of the Really White Vigilante. With all the kinks in the story worked out, it's nothing but days and nights spent staring at sharpened pencils and a host of markers. |
RWV #2 PREVIEW!
May, 2008- With the target release date looming large on the
horizon, I've been processing five months of writing and thoughts into the next issue of the Tales of the Really White Vigilante. |
PAINTING CLASSES | I'm still teaching painting and drawing classes while I'm working on the second volume of my comic book. Classes can be scheduled throughout the week and there are some new slots added to the lineup this week. Check 'em out!
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PLAYING CATCH UP: KANSAS CITY, 2007
The long promised and long awaited recap of my trip to Kansas City last year is just about done. Hopefully coming
fast on the heels of this update: explanations of exactly just what I ended up doing outside of Austin for a few months in the Northeast and Denver. |
MORE CULINARY DELIGHTS WITH IAN!!
"So I was going to the movies, and I was ordering a drink at the concession stand, and like all
good Texans, I ordered a Dr Pepper. The young, robust, African American girl behind the counter informed me they only had Mr. Pibb Extra. I asked, "What's the extra?" She blankly stared ahead and in a robotic, dry montone, quickly replied, "Mr. Pibb Extra has an extra zing of Pibb.
I was sold." |
SHOW THE MAN SOME WELL DESERVED LOVE!
George W. Bush's disapproval
rating went over 70%. For the man who rallied the country's support for a worthless and costly war that has crashed the economy and crippled any hope for a turnaround for ages, while ignoring the problems of social security, healthcare, education, energy, pollution and anything that can't be fixed in an ill spoken soundbite, I still think seventy percent is a bit harsh. I know if I was bribing every American with a fat $300 check twice in eight years, I would hope for at least some measure of gratitude! Like my mom always says, 'If
you don't like the man, at least respect the office!" If any reader out there knows a phrase that can mean any less than that sentiment, please email me your ideas. |
ANOTHER REASON I DON'T VOTE
On a recent anxiety ridden Saturday night, I went out to cool my heels a bit and ended up at a bar on the East Side I rarely
frequent. I ended up running into a friend I don't run into that often. We talked, she pried drinks from me, and we laughed, catching up on old times and discussing wistful possibilities as the night sped by us.
At one point, she was talking about the decisions she's making to put together a Travis County Democratic fundraiser. The 'party' will hold 2,500 people and she's trying to score two of the hippest, biggest bands in Austin. Their cost? Thirty thousand dollars. Shocked, my jaw dropped, and I could only
laugh at the absurdity of it all. Her response? "Oh, I'll just have to raise the money."More proof anyone who votes or believes the system will change is absolutely retarded. |
THE PRESS IS SENSATIONAL!!!
I've noticed the older I get, the less I read newspapers, and the less I care to spend energy being conscious of the news.
I think the laziness, lack of quality, and sheer ignorance of the press is one of the saddest indictments of modern society. Here's a good example of what is happening to just make my brain want a permanent vacation:
Actual true newstory |
IAN SHULTS, WINGMAN
A little tale from Ian's recent trip to Mexico:
"So I spent the night drinking with this twenty year old kid. He asked me why he wasn't picking up any Mexican chicks. I
told him, "It's probably because you're wearing a shirt that says PARTY NAKED on it." He responded, "Do you think so?" "Yeah dude, you're a mess." |
HE'S COMING TO AMERICA
It's been three long years since I last saw Neil Diamond in concert, and it looks like this summer I'll be able to end the drought.
With the release of his new album 'Home After Dark' looming LARGE on the horizon (May 6th), he's going to announce the American leg of his world tour any day now... |
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NEW TIRES MAKE ALL THE DIFFERENCE
Out of necessity, I made a trip up to the tire store. With two front tires in disrepair, a slow leak hounding the rear passenger tire, and a fourth along for the ride, I ended up splurging and plunking down $250 in cash for a new set of tires.
Now, after driving on and off for almost a year on beat up tires is one thing, but riding through town on four tires with traction cranks up the enthusiasm and verve for driving to almost record
highs.
For the record: I still hate driving, but I'm a whole lot safer now. |
ONE OF MY ARCH ENEMIES EXPOSED
As most everyone by this point knows, I have a rather love/hate relationship with movies. I've never been one to want to just
sit down and watch a movie, let alone the latest Hollywood blockbuster. Over the years , my disdain for the uncreative schlock that gets made has focused on all the little bits - I fill up with a nervous energy mentally rewriting the script, changing characters, trying to fill plot holes and worst of all - I spend the movie grimacing when all those sounds created by foley artists.
For the uninitiated, foley artists are the pretentious sounds guys who record all the sounds you hear in a movie. Locked away in a studio, they reach into
a grapefruit to simulate crushing a skull, bang trash cans for swords, etc.
Sure its an art form in its own right, but the sounds sound so fake it tears me up all the time. And then I found this video one late night, and the profession got a just treatment for all to see. (If you have a job, the video may not jive with the workplace) |
R.I.P. DOS XX MAY 5, 1997 - MARCH 19, 2008
On May 5th, 1997, I celebrated Cinco de Mayo with my friends Donnie and Donetta at Kansas City's venerable
Mexican Restaurant Ponak's. Sometime during our experience, we all received Dos XX bottle openers as part of the festivities, along with cheap pitchers and plates of dollar tacos. For eleven years of surprisingly reliable and steady service, my bottle opener finally succumbed to the laws of nature and broke at approximately 11:30. It was perhaps the most amazing piece of cheap molded plastic I have ever come into possession of in my life. |
DATING WHEEL
While on the phone with a good friend catching up on all the sordid details of my life, I tried to defend recent dating patterns and interests
when a perfect analogy rolled off my tongue. Dating in your thirties is like spinning the wheel at the end of the Price is Right. When it starts slowing down, your heart starts to beat faster and harder, and every spot on the wheel becomes magnified - 85 - 25 - 45 - and as it slows down more and more, you start hoping and praying there's enough spin left in the wheel to move it past the 35 cent space and at least catch 60 cents. Of course, there's always that $1.00 space out there too... |
CHANGE DOES YOU GOOD
I spent the day driving through town with a friend I hadn't seen since December. We poked through the active film sets at Austin
Studios, drove around the new Mueller developments expecting to see Jim Carey from the Truman Show, and joked about incorporating a tap dancing Young Frankenstein to the shark-laden dance floors of newly minted downtown clubs.
The conversation switched to a more serious tone when we started talking about the past few months and our situations and changes we've
made. He was particularly impressed I cured myself of the OCD curse that plagued me the past few years: whenever I would get my hands covered in dry, dusty dirt, I would compulsively need to wash them clean immediately or else the wiring in my brain would start to freeze up and I would be tortured. It's now three months without a reoccurrence, and I think it's beaten. |
A MOMENT WITH IAN - CULINARY DELIGHTS!
(editor's note: knowing Ian is a joy, living with him has brought us closer than we'd ever thought possible.
Late nights fused with alcohol bring the following visions to light, I hope you enjoy)
"Venom was talking to me the other day and he actually asked me to go to a pig roast, but I had just gotten up and I had already eaten at Denny's. It was about 1:30 in the afternoon when he called. He told me he's been waking up around 4:30 in the morning lately, because he's been getting wasted a lot lately and passing out drunk around 9 or 10 at night.
So my wife and I both ordered the two egg breakfast, but we both wanted more so
we split a side of pancakes and a side of bacon. My wife was upset because I ordered her an orange juice and, apparently, she doesn't like orange juice anymore. So she was upset and wasn't getting water fast enough. On top of that, we hardly ate any of the food, and she was really parched as we were trying to leave the restaurant's parking lot. We ended up going out the wrong way and couldn't get out the right exit from the parking lot onto I-35. From then on, I was silent.
My second meal of the day was brought on by extreme hunger, because it was 7-8 hours since I last ate, but I was almost out of gas so I had to stop at McDonalds because it was the closest top home. I ordered some nuggets and when I got home I started eating them. A nugget into them I realized just how pale the nuggets were and the next nugget I bit into wasn't fully cooked so I had to tear apart each nugget so I could find out which nugget were cooked or not, and as it turned out, only half were good, but
there were plenty of fries.
I thought about complaining, but really, who cares?" |
SXSW COMES FULL CIRCLE
While I tried my hardest to avoid Austin's annual circus of hipster freakdom this year (and largely succeeded!), I wasn't strong
enough nor anti-social enough to pass up the opportunity to see Tragedy, a Bee Gees metal cover band during the waning hours of the four or five day drunken festival. While I only made the final five songs, it was the sort of experience that could only be described by repeatedly muttering expletives under your breath. As the beers and shots flowed to soothe my soul after the performance, I was able to complete sentences once again and return to the realm of living,
breathing human beings and was soothed by my good friend who reveled in my newfound love of all things pop culture.
Of course, during the performance I couldn't help but think about the first SXSW I experienced, culminating with a live performance on the same stage at Emo's by the Diamond Smugglers, an equally abrasive yet lovable aborted Neil Diamond cover band. Oh, where exactly have the last six years of my life gone? |
A GREAT FRIEND LOVES THIS VIDEO
So in the spirit of humanity, I'll pass it along free of cynical comments.
Watch it for yourself. |
THINGS THAT MAKE ME CRINGE
After immersing myself in pop culture in the vast frozen north, some of those bad habits have been reinforced by my current
living situation. So in no particular order, here's some stuff that my life has been exposed to recently that really tears my soul into pieces: Millionaire Matchmaker, 4:30 AM with Ian Shults, watching VH1's Best Week Ever and following it with the Soup, reality competitions on MTV, and the word 'fierce'. |
THINGS I LOVE THAT MAKE MY FRIENDS CRINGE
My secret love of all things Alton Brown has raised plenty of eyebrows among my good friends, who also asked when
me if I was 60 years old for my unbridled enjoyment of Prairie Home Companion, my addiction to nutella, and inexplicable reasons for never drinking enough water. |
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THE LATEST
STORIES...
+ SNEAK PREVIEW
at Tales of the Really White Vigilante #2
COMING SOON:
+ A TRIP TO KANSAS CITY
Thanksgiving with friends and the cold
+ NORTH(EAST)ERN EXPOSURE
My two month sabbatical in the North
+ THINGS TO DO IN DENVER
The splendor of Colorado
ALREADY THERE:
+ TALES OF THE
REALLY WHITE VIGILANTE
the tale of one young man's attempts
to stop the gentrification of East Austin
a 62 page comic book.
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FULL ARCHIVE
JOIN THE
MAILING LIST |
ONGOING AND UPCOMING SHOWS
2008
MAY 10-11
Alter Ego Show
Gallery DV8 2300 East 16th, Austin, Texas
nearly thirty Austin artists explore their other sides
JUNE - JULY
Tales of the Really White Vigilante, Volume 2
our intrepid hero battles hipsters, SXSW and battles his own demons
NOVEMBER
Solo Painting Show
my first complete solo
show since April, 2006 with all new works
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CURATED GROUP SHOWS
RADICAL NAUTICAL
August, 2007 Gallery Lombardi, Austin, Texas
with Ian Shults, Rachel Koper, Kevin Peakes and Kevin Tijernia
Austin Chronicle Review
FATHER'S DAY SHOW
July, 2006 Bolm Studios, Austin, Texas
"Top Ten Art Shows, 2006" Austin Chronicle
WILL THERE EVER BE A RAINBOW?
The Unicorn Art Show
curated with Ian Shults
November, 2005 Bolm Studios, Austin, Texas
"Best Group Show, 2005" Austin Chronicle
SHOULDA BEEN A PLUMBER TOO
October, 2004 Bolm Studios, Austin, Texas
WHILE WE'RE YOUNG
April, 2004 Blue Genie Art, Austin, Texas
SHOULDA BEEN A PLUMBER
October, 2003 Blue Genie Art, Austin, Texas
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